i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize
