Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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