where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
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