Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
A+ Viking dick
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
