I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
