when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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