good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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