WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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