i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
