hotel room ftw
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Randomize
