So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize