can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
