I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Randomize
