hotel room ftw
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize