What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
this beer tastes like vomit already
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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