my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
