Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
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