respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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