Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
