JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
