She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
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laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
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My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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