Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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