the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
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