So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
These Attractive Criminals Got Modeling Contracts After Getting Arrested
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.