craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
