i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Randomize
