I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
