she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
be right there i have to get my cape
What happened to fro yo and sex?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
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