summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
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