just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
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