saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
