I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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