um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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