so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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