It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
