dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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