Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
