You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize