That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I just had sex on a roof
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