Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
