how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
P.S. I can't hear my feet
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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