The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
And my parents said I crawled through the house
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
