Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
