my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize