What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
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