i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
