what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Randomize
