I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
