i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
We need to get me chipped asap
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
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