I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
